What might happen in your life if you go beyond the walls of your heart?

What might happen in our lives if we ventured beyond our perceived walls?

I saw a movie several months ago originally called “Through The Wall.”  If you are in North America, you might know this movie as “The Wedding Plan.” 

It chronicles the journey of a religious woman who, after her groom confesses he doesn’t love her less than a month before their wedding, decides to go full speed ahead with her plans.  As she said, “”I have the venue, the dress, the apartment; God can easily come up with my groom.” 

What happens next?  See the movie.

As I left the theater, chatting with another moviegoer who was equally taken with the spiritual theme, we passed a woman who was shaking her head in denial of what she’d just seen.  She snorted, “It’s a fairy tale.  Fairy tales don’t happen in real life.”

You’re about to read the real life story of a friendship, taken from my recent Facebook post, that began when two people made the choice to go beyond their perceived walls. 

Fairy tales can and do happen in real life. 

As Albert Einstein said, “Imagination is more important than knowledge.”

As Chester Bennington said, “Let’s all choose to be a part of the cure.”

I experienced a life-changing stroke two weeks after a wannabe heart attack called broken heart syndrome (or, if you like big words better, stress cardiomyopathy). It takes at least a month before the stress hormones calm down enough for the symptoms to go away. Someone yelled at me two weeks later, way before I had healed and in defiance of my warning to treat me with kindness, gentleness and love. I felt my brain explode. I still don’t know how it is that I didn’t die. 5.5 years later, I’m recovering more and more of my life each day.

I am a walking miracle.

Among many other things, my stroke left me without that censor in my brain that stopped me from saying profane or inappropriate things. I’d also lost access to that part of my brain that allowed me to understand and express my truth to others. I was newly terrified of trusting people because of the way the stroke had happened. I didn’t trust the words that came from my mouth, I didn’t trust that people would honor my fragility, and I didn’t trust my ability to move through my life.

I was alone, scared, and brain damaged.

I couldn’t trust myself to say more than a sentence or two to the people I’d meet. I rehearsed what I would say before paying for groceries, just like I’d done years before when attempting to speak French in Montreal. I’d been a radio host, a teacher, and a writer, and I’d been good at each job. Just like that, I’d lost the words I needed to get through each day.

A young cashier, less than half my age, always smiled at me when I’d pay for my purchases at the health food store. He didn’t criticize me when I frequently made mistakes with the credit card machine. Most cashiers rolled their eyes at me.

This young cashier seemed nice, and I decided to pretend we were friends. It felt like a safe way to regain the ability to connect with people. If he rejected me, which I expected he would, I wouldn’t have lost anything.

Because the censor in my brain had blown, I’d walk into his store and begin mock yelling at him for not returning my calls, emails, or faxes. I remember my loud voice echoing off the walls. Something made him play the game back with me. He didn’t reject me! He actually seemed to enjoy our game!

Day by day, year by year, we developed a real connection. He began calling me his favorite. I was still alone, scared and brain damaged. Hearing someone call me his favorite meant the world to me! I gave him a God Box for his birthday, a place where God could find his written prayers. He gave me kindness, confidence, and the gift of his presence. My brain continued to slowly heal, and he cheered me on.

Today is his last day at the health food store. I think he’s been working there for seven years, and I honor his courage in taking the next step into creating a beautiful future.

I gave him a little pewter heart that says, “Friendship isn’t a big thing. It’s a million small things.” He gave me a hug and said we’d keep in touch.

I can’t imagine where I’d be today without his friendship and support. Thank you, James, from my heart.

I ask you, my nearly 900 Facebook friends, to join me in wishing James well. He has the heart of a healer.

What might happen if you walk through your perceived walls?

May all your dreams come true.

“You can’t be afraid of people willing to hurt you, cause if you fear life, you’ll never live.”  Chester Bennington

PS  Here’s James’ Facebook response, hot off the stream. Isn’t he wonderful!   “Ahhhhh….Sheryl this was quite overwhelming for me to read. It’s not always easy finding the right words. But I’ll try. You are without a doubt one of the kindest, warmest, and funniest people I’ve ever met. I feel so lucky our paths crossed and so truly privileged to be your friend. Thank you and all your wonderful friends for your words. Means so much to me.”